Make it Happen


“You can’t just sit there and wait for people to give you that golden dream.

You’ve got to get out there and make it happen for yourself.”
– Diana Ross

The work day was over and the sun was soon setting. We quickly put on our hiking boots and took off to Snow Canyon State Park. Feeling thankful to live in beautiful Southern Utah with so many hiking trails close by. It’s so important to make time for the little things, especially if you are really busy! Spend time in nature. Breathe in the fresh air. Enjoy the sunset. Be present with the ones you love. Show up for your own life. Get up, get out, get going. No excuses. Don’t sit around waiting for perfect scenarios to magically appear. You’ve got to go out there and make it happen.

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Why Handkerchiefs are Awesome

Handkerchiefs are one of those old things that have got lost in time and are now a bit unconventional. Which is unfortunate because handkerchiefs are awesome! Now, you may be feeling the same way about handkerchiefs as I previously did, “Ew! Gross! Why on earth would I want to blow my nose on a dirty piece of cloth that has a weeks worth of snot crusted onto it?!”

I pity my uneducated, uninformed self of the past. To my surprise, using a handkerchief actually isn’t gross at all! I use a clean hankie each day, and DON’T actually blow my nose on the same section of the hankie twice (until it’s washed that is). I wish I’d known how cool they are sooner!


Handkerchiefs have been around for many, many years. Aside from the obvious use of personal hygiene, they have been used in ceremonies, for signaling, in dances, and to carry things in etc. But that all changed in the 20th century.

The downfall of the handkerchief. In 1924 the Kleenex was introduced as a way for women to remove cold cream. Within a few years they were being used and marketed as disposable hankies. (You can read more about the history of Kleenex here, it is actually quite interesting. You could also google “kleenex 1920’s advertisements” to see some cool adverts.) Society had become germ-a-phobic and saw handkerchiefs as unsanitary. Which is understandable considering they lived through the Spanish influenza outbreak of 1918.


Benefits:

Handkerchiefs are softer and more durable than tissues. Trust me, your nose will appreciate this!

• They are way better for the environment. The negative impacts of disposable tissues on the environment could be a whole blogpost of its own. To keep it simple… by using handkerchiefs you’ll; save trees, save water, avoid processing plants pollution, chemicals, and toxins, and produce less waste etc.

• Save money! Lets assume your household buys a pack of 13 handkerchiefs for $13 instead of using a $2 box of tissues per month. The hankies will pay for themselves in less than 7 months, and can be used for years to come. You’ll have even more savings if you make the handkerchiefs yourself. 

• It’s chic and chivalrous. Imagine sitting at the movie theater, crying over some romantic film. Wouldn’t you rather dry your eyes with a beautiful embroidered hankie with lace trim, instead of a tissue that shreds to pieces in your hand? Or if you are a guy you can kindly come to a ladies rescue by offering her a clean hankie of your own. I could go on and on with examples, but I won’t, because I think you get the idea. 

• They are multipurpose. Blow your nose, wipe away tears, use as a towel to dry your hands, wipe sweat from your forehead, or on a hot summer day you can dampen it with cold water and place on the back of your neck to cool down. The Rural Economist has a really great blogpost called 30 Reasons to Carry a Handkerchief. You should check it out for more info.


I wash my handkerchiefs either with bath towels, or a load of clothes. It hardly effects the laundry load size. They dry very quickly on a clothe’s line or in the dryer. It’s really not a big deal to launder them. I don’t bother with ironing them like some people do though. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

There are so many handkerchief options on Amazon. Absolutely beautiful women’s hankies, plain white ones, dapper manly hankies, organic cotton and other eco-friendly options. You might be able to find some at a local store, or you can always make your own.

I’m embarrassed to admit that I was really nervous to start using handkerchiefs. Donovan and I have been using them for a year now and have zero regrets about making the switch. We wish we would’ve started using them years ago!

Friends, it’s time to stop wasting your money on those scratchy tissues and start using a hankie!  Together we can nix the misconceptions about using “snot rags” haha.

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The Power of Half Concept

This concept is simple, and amazingly effective! And as we all know, simplicity is awesome.
To quote Sir Isaac Newton,

“Truth is ever to be found in simplicity,
and not in the multiplicity and confusion of things.”

Use the power of half, to receive more. Cut your usage and consumption in half, and be rewarded with double.

Example: If you use half the amount of dish soap that you normally use, your current bottle will now give you double what it previously did. You will be cutting your spending on dish soap in half, while getting twice as much!

By doing this, you can cut your spending in half without using coupons or drastically changing your lifestyle… just start using less!

LESS REALLY IS MORE!


Things you can cut in half:

  • shower gel
  • laundry detergent
  • shampoo & conditioner
  • basically all toiletries
  • cleaning products
  • if you get any beauty services done, do them half as often
  • cut the amount of your subscriptions in half
  • cut showering time in half
  • replace half (or all) of milk or broth in recipes with water

Remove half of the light bulbs in your house. You will still be getting plenty of light and probably won’t even notice the difference. You’ll automatically cut your electricity bill for lighting in half, it’ll be better for your circadian rhythm, and you’ll have less replacement light bulbs to buy in the future. At night when you turn on the lights, only turn on half of what you would usually turn on. You probably don’t need a lamp and a ceiling light on at the same time.

If you have kids, cut the amount of their activities in half. They are probably over-committed and over worked anyways. Kids need free time to just be kids.

When you turn on the water faucet, try turning it only half way to where you normally would. For most things you don’t need that much water spouting out. You can easily wash your hands with very little water.

If you do have grass, mow your lawn half as often. It’ll free up time, and it’s healthier for the grass. You’ll be using half as much gasoline or electricity. If the grass is a bit longer then it retains moisture and you won’t have to water as much, and it prevents the sun from scorching the roots.

Cut your amount of vehicles you own in half. You will save so much money! If you are a one car family and it’s not practical for you to go car free, try going car light.

Cut back on how often you go to the grocery store and do other errands. Cut your time wasters in half. Do laundry half as often.

Spend less on gifts, be present more.
Talk less, listen more.
Complain less, give thanks more.
Watch less TV, read more.
Eat out less, eat healthy foods more.

Obviously use your best judgement with this. DON’T start eating less fruits and veggies, or drinking half us much water haha. Also, make sure you aren’t cutting things so much that they aren’t able to effectively do their job, like soap. This shouldn’t be a problem though, as most people currently use way more product than they need to be using.


Reduce and simplify.

If you have less stuff in your house, it’s less to clean. You’ll have less stress, more free time, and more money.

If you want to take it to the next level try completely cuttings things out instead of just cutting in half. Replace disposables with reusables. Use handkerchiefs instead of tissues. A reusable water bottle instead of plastic water bottles. Washcloths or rags instead of paper towels etc. Click here for more ideas.

“If everyone demanded peace instead of another television set,
then there’d be peace.”
― John Lennon

By consuming less, you will receive more. When you consume less, you can give more. Consuming less means you’ll have less of a negative impact on the environment.
Consume less, be more.

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Zion in December


“What good is the warmth of summer,
without the cold of winter to give it sweetness.”

― John Steinbeck, Travels with Charley: In Search of America

 

Winter in Zion National Park is always spectacular! These photos are from two different days I spent in Zion December 2016. A day after heavy rains and flash flooding, the sun was shining brightly with a brilliant blue sky. Waterfalls that only appear following heavy rainfall can be see in a few of these pictures. The other day was towards the end of the month, a few days after a snowstorm.

 

 

“A cold wind was blowing from the north, and it made the trees rustle like living things.”
― George R.R. Martin, A Game of Thrones

I watched in awe at this scene for many moments. Notice how the waterfall gently lands onto that blanket of snow!

Can you spot this waterfall?

My trusty Kia Soul, to show the scale of how massive the cliffs are in Zion.

“Are the days of winter sunshine just as sad for you, too?
When it is misty, in the evenings, and I am out walking by myself,
it seems to me that the rain is falling through my heart
and causing it to crumble into ruins.”

― Gustave Flaubert

Check out this phenomenal tree! There is a hole that goes straight through it!
I can just imagine it singing Bon Jovi’s “You Give Love a Bad Name”.
Shot through the heart
And you’re to blame
Darling, you give love a bad name…

You can’t quite see them, but there were tons of icicles hanging off the cliffs in this narrow canyon.

Boulders blocking a small waterfall, so it’s flowing against the side of a cliff, around the blockades, and then down.
Don’t mess with water, it does what it wants!


Muddy waters. Remnants of previous flooding.

Waterfall above, and a closer view of the same waterfall below.

“December’s wintery breath is already clouding the pond,
frosting the pane, obscuring summer’s memory…”
― John Geddes

“I’ll fill those canyons in your soul, like a river lead you home.
And I’ll walk a step behind, in the shadows so you shine.
Just ask, it will be done and I will prove my love, until you’re sure that I’m the one.”

– Gary Allan

“There are dark shadows on the earth, but its lights are stronger in the contrast.”
– Charles Dickens

“Winter then in its early and clear stages, was a purifying engine that ran unhindered over city and country,
alerting the stars to sparkle violently and shower their silver light into the arms of bare upreaching trees.
It was a mad and beautiful thing that scoured raw the souls of animals and man, driving them before it until they loved to run.
And what it did to Northern forests can hardly be described,
considering that it iced the branches of the sycamores on Chrystie Street and swept them back and forth until they rang like ranks of bells.”

― Mark Helprin, Winter’s Tale

“Snow was falling,
so much like stars
filling the dark trees
that one could easily imagine
its reason for being was nothing more
than prettiness.”
― Mary Oliver

“That time of year thou mayst in me behold
When yellow leaves, or none, or few, do hang
Upon those boughs which shake against the cold,
Bare ruin’d choirs, where late the sweet birds sang.
In me thou seest the twilight of such day
As after sunset fadeth in the west,
Which by and by black night doth take away,
Death’s second self, that seals up all in rest.
In me thou see’st the glowing of such fire
That on the ashes of his youth doth lie,
As the death-bed whereon it must expire
Consumed with that which it was nourish’d by.
This thou perceivest, which makes thy love more strong,
To love that well which thou must leave ere long.”
― William Shakespeare, Shakespeare’s Sonnets

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Why I Cancelled Netflix

I did it. I’ve been debating with myself about this for a couple of months, and I finally did it. I cancelled my Netflix account!

I’ve always loved TV and movies. I’m a huge cinema fan. Half of my childhood we had TV, the other half we had no TV. I’ve been on both sides of the extremes. Every day after school in 4th grade, I’d come home, sit in my purple bubble chair, have a Pepsi in one hand, and a candy bar in the other (so healthy, I know) and watch a whole line up of shows. Watching stuff can be a way of escaping your reality. Which to a degree can be helpful, but can also become very unhealthy if you are detaching from life too much. People also get major FOMO about media. I think it’s all about finding the right balance for your life. I enjoy watching movies, but I needed to break the habit of just mindlessly turning on Netflix. 

Here are the reasons why I quit, and maybe why you should too.
(this can totally apply to hulu plus, cable, dish etc as well)

Time:
– 
If you watch 2 hours of TV per day, that’s 730 hours per year (2 hours X 365 days per year), which is 30.41 DAYS per year (730 hours total /24 hours in a day). So 2 hours of TV watching would consumer ONE WHOLE MONTH of your year!! If you watch 4 hours a day, that’s two whole freaking months! Talk about a time waster.

– Live more intentionally. Life is quickly passing all of us by, and I can think of many other things I’d rather use that time for. (hobbies, a side business, quality family time, read more etc.)

Money:
– 
If you are paying around $10 a month for Netflix, that’s $120 per year, $600 for 5 years, and $1,200 for 10 years. That’s not including the inevitable price increases. Looking ahead 5 or 10 years seems like far into the future, but we all know it goes by incredibly fast. Imagine how much money you will be wasting if you are paying for other entertainment too! It’s not unrealistic for people to have Netflix, and Hulu Plus, AND a TV service. *shakes head slowly from side to side*

The library has a huge selection of movies, TV shows, and documentaries that you can borrow, FOR FREE. Also, you or a family member probably already owns a lot of movies.

Content:
Every month Netflix has slowly been removing the movies and shows I loved. I’m not interested in the new stuff they have been adding. When Stranger Things season 2 comes out, I will just go watch it at a family members house.

I believe that everything we watch or listen to, has an effect on us. Positive or negative. A lot of what’s on Netflix now is junk. Mind numbing shows and content I believe to be inappropriate.

 

Overall I just needed to break the habit of watching Netflix. It wasn’t enhancing my life. If I do decide to watch something, I’m going to have to borrow something from the library, actually put a dvd in, and consciously decide if I want to watch the next episode. I think it’s horrible how Netflix auto plays episode after episode. We’ve probably all been sucked into watching too much TV from that “feature”. In the future I may decide to have Netflix again, but for now I’m going focus on enjoying my life, not fictional characters lives. (With a few exceptions, like MacGyver, LOTR, and HP haha, progress not perfection.)

I hope that you have found this info useful. Please leave a comment if you have any insights you’d like to share. Thank you for reading this. 

Peace & Love
-Kayla Oliver

 

 

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50 Things to do Instead of Spending Money

You don’t need to spend money to have a great time. Here’s a list of 50 things that you can do for free.
(If you have any ideas that aren’t on the list, leave a comment and I might make a part two.)

  1. Go for a walk.
  2. Enjoy a picnic.
  3. Take a hike.
  4. Ride your bicycle.
  5. Sports at the park (b-ball, soccer, frisbee etc)
  6. Borrow a movie or documentary from the library.
  7. Borrow a book from the library.
  8. Bake cookies
  9. Make homemade bread.
  10. Star gaze.
  11. Have a dance party. Even if it’s just you and your cat.
  12. Visit a friend, neighbor, or family member.
  13. Clean your house.
  14. Serve others.
  15. Play a board game or card game.
  16. Play a musical instrument or sing.
  17. Listen to classical music. Here are some of my favorites.
  18. Write a list of what you’re grateful for.
  19. Practice yoga.
  20. Meditate.
  21. Learn something new.
  22. Visit museums on free days.
  23. Do an art project.
  24. Try a new recipe.
  25. Do some yard work.
  26. DIY spa day. (facial, pedicure, deep condition hair, hot bath, the works haha)
  27. Family history.
  28. Write a letter.
  29. Watch the sunset or sunrise.
  30. Pick up litter around town or in nature.
  31. Visit free historical sites.
  32. Admire nature, whether it’s the beach, mountains, or desert.
  33. Donate clothing or things you no longer need.
  34. Do a task you’ve been procrastinating.
  35. Netflix and chill.
  36. Laugh.
  37. Watch a TED talk or something inspirational.
  38. Attend a free seminar or event.
  39. Volunteer at an animal shelter.
  40. Explore your own city.
  41. Do something you enjoyed as a child.
  42. Sell something on craigslist.
  43. Play a video game or computer game.
  44. Write down your goals with a plan to accomplish them.
  45. Bird watching.
  46. Catch up on some sleep.
  47. Learn a new language.
  48. Enjoy live music (open mic nights, concerts in the park etc)
  49. Relax and drink some tea/lemonade/smoothie/hot cocoa etc.
  50. Create or update your budget.
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Why People Shop

I’m a people watcher. I find it fascinating to observe others. Recently I was at a busy section of a shopping center and had several minutes to people watch. I observed a lot of shoppers and had some insights about consumerism that I want to share. Specifically about WHY people shop. Most of us can probably relate to some or all of these reasons. It’s important to recognize our behavior, what we do and why. Find alternatives to things that aren’t benefiting us. Then continually work on changing our habits and beliefs to be more inline with our goals and values. We should always work at becoming better.

Some reasons why people shop…

Productivity: People often confuse busyness with being productive. It’s a terrible misconception in society. People feel important if they have things to do, places to go, stuff to buy. Some feel productive when they cross things off their shopping list.

Amusement: Some people shop for fun. There’s the ladies that go shopping just to hang out with the girls. Shopping til they drop. Tourists that buy souvenirs instead of taking part in enriching experiences. Since the 1980’s shopping has been the number one hobby of teenage girls. Shopping shouldn’t be considered a hobby! (my teenage/early twenties self would roll her eye’s at me for saying that haha.) Here is an interesting article about some alarming shopping statistics. Now, as a fashion lover I’m not saying we should never shop for enjoyment, just reign it in. I try to hold off on shopping until I need something, then I’ll allow myself to enjoy shopping for that need.

Accomplishment: Some people feel like they are accomplishing something when shopping. They think of shopping as a treasure hunt or a game. They feel smart and successful when they find good deals, use coupons, scour sales racks, get store rewards etc. Are you really #winning though when you are spending money unnecessarily?

Emotions: Two words, Retail Therapy. People shop because of sadness, boredom, or to celebrate. People often turn to shopping to fill a void. Buying new workout clothes isn’t going to automatically make you fit. Buying more makeup isn’t going to necessarily make you feel prettier. That new sports equipment isn’t going to make you an all-star. Lasting happiness comes from within, not from buying a bunch of crap.

Purpose: I find this incredibly sad, yet most of us have probably been here. Some people shop for simply something to do. My mom once told me that for a time during my childhood she went to the grocery store almost every single day. Being a stay at home mom, she needed some socializing and a place to go. Some people who work from home go get a coffee or a soda each morning, just for a reason to get dressed and get out of the house each day. We should have more purpose in our lives rather than just being a consumer.

Obviously I’m not perfect. I’ve definitely fit into every single one of these categories at different parts of my life. Over the last few years I’ve dramatically changed my views on shopping. I’ve wised up. There’s way more to this world and life than shopping shopping shopping. If you need ideas on free things to do instead of spending money, check out this list.

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Yellow Man Pictograph & Petroglyph Site

At the Yellow Man site there are petroglyphs as well as pictographs! I really love rock art. It’s fascinating and beautiful!

To get to this site you will drive on the Smithsonian Butte Scenic Byway, then turn off on a little road. A high clearance 4 wheel drive vehicle is highly recommended. Even then, you may need to hike the last few miles like I did.

 

 

Abandoned building along the way. I haven’t been able to find any historical information on this yet.

 

Still has an old hinge on the door frame!

 

The petroglyphs and pictographs are up in an alcove. You will need to scramble to get up there. I believe the rock art is Anasazi. I’ve been trying to research, and haven’t been able to find much of anything yet. If I find any new info, I will update this post.

 

 

I couldn’t decide which sunset picture I liked best, so here’s a few haha.

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Big News!

Big news! I published a book!! It’s called Light and Love. It’s a collection of Christmas poetry that I’ve written. The poems touch on subjects of light, love, Christmas magic, nostalgia, as well as grief and death. It’s available on Amazon as a paperback as well as a kindle edition. I’m running a promo on it and the kindle edition is available to read for free until Friday December 23, 2016.  If you do read it, I’d love to know what your favorite poem in the book is! Also, if you like it, it’d help a ton if you could leave a rating or review on Amazon. Here is the link to my author page on Amazon where you can find both formats of the book. In honor of my 8th wedding anniversary today, I’d like to share a poem from the book. 

 

Christmas with my Love


Christmas with my love, there’s nowhere else I’d rather be,

Nestled together by the fireplace, so cozy and warm,

Towering above us, is our majestic Christmas tree,

Illuminating our home with sentimental charm.


Gazing out the frosty window at the moonlit wintry scene,

Blankets of snow cover the fields around us,

And a dark pine tree forest sleeps in the distance.
The world is still, mesmerized by the snowflakes gently twirling down from the sky.

The crackling of the fire serenades us on this magical night.
Held in your arms, I can feel the beating of your beautiful heart,
The smell of your skin intoxicates my soul,
Flames cast a warm glow onto your handsome stubbled face,

 

Hypnotized by the flicker in your brilliant blue eyes,
You can see straight through me, no one knows me better than you.
You my darling are gentle and loving and mischievously alluring.
My dear, my love, what do you see in me?

 

Captivated by your deep voice softly singing carols,
My heart flutters as you pull me closer,
Slowly leaning in, your full lips delicately kiss mine,
I love you, I love you,

 

Your presence brings me peace,
With you I can let my inhibitions go,
Content to stay forever in this tranquil winter bliss.
Christmas with my love, my joy, my whole heart.

 

 

 

 

 

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